Before I was born again, I entered into a covenant of purity to preserve myself until marriage. That was in 2001, but after two years, I felt it was a mistake. My heart was not committed to it. I felt like I had caged myself.

I remember in my estate at the time, somewhere in Egbeda, I would call around all the guys asking if there was any party happening. They wanted to know why I was so freaked about going to a party. No party ever happened. Not one.

I was in the renowned boys secondary school, Kings College, Lagos and I had one more year left. Final year was one where nobody could stop you from going out. It was also a year when most boys lose it. That period, I felt that even though I couldn’t have sex, I would do every other thing.

I didn’t visit our sister college, Queens College until I was in my final year. They were having their cultural night and when I got there I felt like I had wasted six years and I thought to myself, “no wonder all these boys come here.’ There were tall, short, slim, fair, fine girls. There were just girls everywhere and all this while I had spent six years with just boys, but at that point it was too late! *laughs*.

When I decided to start living right and stop looking for opportunities to do bad things, the opportunities started to come.

In 2003, I gave my life to Christ in my room. That day I was home and was just thinking. I already had the basic knowledge of salvation and all. But this time I decided that I would live for God and let Him be the captain of my ship. I was reading my bible before then, I went to church before then, but after this it was different, it was new. Truth is I wasn’t a bad boy; I was just a dead boy.

God had always been shielding me even when I didn’t want Him to. I managed to stay true to my covenant of purity till I got married. So yes, I married my wife as a virgin.

(Read the preceding part of this story on our website.)

(Part 2/2) When I got into university, a friend invited me to a fellowship and I met God again. People say they have a dramatic meeting with God and all their sins fall away and they lose interest in sinning, but this wasn't my case.

With each passing day, I started knowing more and received grace and strength until eventually I stopped masturbating. Then I had issues with relationships. I had always wanted one that was pleasing to God but things managed to spiral downwards into sexual intimacy. I started waiting on God for a spouse and stayed single.

All kinds of eligible guys came around but I turned them down because many of them didn't care so much about God. But after several years of believing and living the ‘good girl’ life, I started to feel as though something was wrong with me since nothing could be wrong with God. I wouldn't admit it to myself but I felt God had failed me.

I went back to the mode of comforting my emotions with sexual indulgence. I got involved with a guy at work and was friends with benefits for a while but my spirit wouldn't just let me rest. So I called it off after a lot of struggle.

All this while, I was going to church and being honest with God about my struggles, failings, anger and disappointment. He heard. He helped me say no to those things which were obviously eating at me. I rediscovered my relationship with God, but I still masturbated for a while.

It's been almost two years now since I stopped. I still make mistakes but I rise and don't stay in it. I know God loves me regardless of where I've been. I'm accepted and a treasure. God and I are working together to make something great out of this life of mine.

(Part 1/2) I was 6 years old when my life changed forever. I stumbled on a sexually graphic magazine in my dad's wardrobe and saw people doing things. I started to feel funny but didn't know what it meant. Then I realised I had a part of me that I would touch when I wanted to pee and it felt good. That was how I started masturbating.

I continued on and on even though I knew it was wrong. I was a Christian child. So I would make vows to God, only to break them shortly after. I even went as far as placing a curse on myself just to deter or scare myself but it never lasted. I always went back to indulge myself.

I then realised I was growing very slowly at the time. I was in my 3rd year of senior secondary school and had no breasts, unlike my mates. I got laughed at and taunted a lot for it and it really worsened my already established esteem issues. So I would masturbate to comfort myself and feel good after serious bouts of feeling depressed and worthless.

I was also criticised a lot at home for being strong willed and the love I desired wasn't shown to me so I felt rejected both at home and in school. I had been verbally and sexually assaulted by a boy in my area (who said he wanted to sleep with me) and that really stuck in my head and later, by a lesson teacher.

At some point, I got involved in lesbianism while in secondary school. I just craved acceptance. I wanted to feel okay, like one of the normal ones.

(Read the concluding part of this story on our website.)

In 2008, I was a worker/leader at my fellowship while at University. I'm sure many of us know what I'm talking about when I say the work got quite hectic and time consuming. There were church services, awareness, home visitations, drama meetings, leaders’ meetings, etc… I was at church practically every day!

I was also a medical student (pre-clinical) who wasn't particularly the right mould or fit for the course. There's a usual stereotype which I wasn't, so many people didn't believe I could make it through medical school. Some people, including my supposed guidance counsellor, actually advised me to cross out of Medicine. To make matters worse, I was also working as a fashion designer.

I eventually had to cut down on fashion designing but I was still under a lot of pressure. Most of it from within, from serious self-doubt and my usual pessimistic bouts. I remember going to fellowship after school one day quite sad, thinking about how I was going to pass after having listened to a lot of ‘negative press’. Then in my heart I started to speak with God, saying “Lord, I don't know how you will do it but I don't want to fail ooh! Let these people who don't believe in me be proven wrong” (including me at that time). Then God told me something I’ve never forgotten since. He said "I'm making a covenant of peace with you. You will have no resit or repeat till you finish from medical school." He fulfilled that promise!

I was inducted into the Medical and Dental Council of Nigeria on September 22, 2014, with no resit or repeat. Was it all smooth? No! Did I doubt sometimes? Yes! But somehow, by the grace of God, I chose to keep believing God's report and it did me good. I saw God at work in my life, doing things, teaching me how to read, making learning easy, bestowing favour to me in ways I couldn't possibly imagine. And he surrounded me with people who challenged and helped me. And what's more? He added jara! I was one of two candidates who had distinction viva which is oral exams organized for exceptional candidates in surgery final exams. Well I wasn't picked, but getting to that point alone was thrilling for me!

The Lord is such a wonderful teacher and incredibly wise. If you let him, he'll lead you. Serving God can never be overemphasized! It simply pays. I believe that is the utmost secret.

(Read the preceding parts of this story on our timeline.)

(Part 3/3) After I finally graduated from school, things began to move forward for me and I began to see that God really cares, but then God kept telling me that my career is not what he called me to do. He asked me to focus on Him, but I wouldn’t listen. The Lord said, “go back to that book where you wrote down those things. It was I who put them in your heart, you need to focus on them.”

After a lot of setbacks, I started working on my fashion line. I made some clothes and my pieces were featured in Today's Woman Magazine. I speak to youths and teenagers now. I do a lot of teenage ministry. I'm doing what I wrote down 16 years ago. It doesn’t matter what people have done, it doesn’t matter what they’ve gone through, it doesn’t matter what kind of life they’ve lived, anyone who is in Christ is a new creation, “Old things have passed away, all things are new.”

I’m no longer scared, my mind is secure. When the devil tries to come in I tell him, “Keep quiet, it’s a lie, stop lying. You and I both know that you can’t stop lying. So you need to get out now.” I don’t give way to the devil to mess up my mind anymore.

(Read the preceding parts of this story on our website.)

(Part 2/3) When I went back to school to finish up my extra semester, something miraculous happened. A friend of mine who was the pastor of his fellowship invited me to worship with them. I walked into one of the rooms and saw this group of rambunctious freshers, and God just said, “Start a prayer group with these boys.” I walked up to them and asked “How many of you can pray in the spirit?” None of them could. So I prayed with them and laid hands on them and they started praying in the spirit. 

We started a daily prayer meeting where we met for 3 hours and prayed in tongues. After a while, it dawned on me that God had a reason for my life. The more I prayed, the more clarity I had as to what exactly God wanted me to do with my life.

I had a ‘Purpose Book’ where I wrote down things like: Who I am, what I want to become, what I like to do, what I can do for free. I wanted to speak to youths; I wanted to be a fashion designer.

Earlier in my second year in school, my campus pastor was leading a prayer session in my fellowship and then he said that we should ask God to reveal his call for our lives. I said “God, you can give me anything, just don’t make me a pastor.” My parents are pastors and we didn’t grow up being financially stable. We were told to pray every day for 30 mins to 1 hour, and whatever God told us we should write it down.

I went back to pray and God told me I would be a pastor. I said, “This is not fair.” I wrote it down but never did anything about it until after I decided I was just going to kick it with the Lord full time. I consecrated myself to Him and he started telling me where to go, who to speak to, who to meet, who not to. I got smarter and sharper.

(Read the concluding part of this story on our website.)

(Part 1/3) My sexual abuse began when I was six. One of our neighbours upstairs would take me to his room, touch me, and grind up on me. Because of this experience, I quickly took to the pornography I was already exposed to through friends and some family members. By the time I was 8, I was completely addicted.

During the holidays, a female cousin taught another cousin and I to play with each other’s bodies. It reminded me of all the porn I was addicted to and I enjoyed it. Although I remained a virgin, I picked up other vices - cigarettes and alcohol.

I had gotten a job in Lagos before I found out I had an extra year in school. I was working and going to school, and it was working well. Unfortunately, I did not do so well and got another extra semester. I had to leave my job and go back to school full time. I spiralled into depression. I was talking to myself. I wasn't eating. I wasn’t sleeping well.

I had friends who were doing their youth service placement in Ilorin, Kwara State. They came down to school to get me. I didn’t even know how I got to Ilorin. It was when I got there that I asked where I was. One of my friends just started to cry. Popular preacher Pastor Biodun Fatoyinbo was still in Ilorin at this time, so they took me to his church. They were having this amazing worship session. I heard the Lord say, “Bisi, I love you, I care for you… I care for what you're going through, allow me to heal you." 

In my mind, I was like, “I'm messed up. You can’t use someone like me. You can’t touch me. I'm not useful to you. I'm a mess, my mind is a mess, and you can’t use someone who doesn’t think straight.” He said: "Trust me." That day I cried. I was wailing at the top of my lungs and when I got up from that place, I was completely whole and well.

(Read the concluding parts of this story on our website.)

(Read the preceding part of this story on our website.)

(Part 2/2) I started reading pornographic novels when I was 12. It then progressed to porn magazines and then I started watching it. I spent so much money on porn that if I had saved all the money, it would have been enough to buy myself a fairly used car. 

So after I stopped smoking weed, I was still struggling with porn. It was so bad that during fasting, after I finished, I would go straight to porn. Because I studied psychology, I tried several techniques, I read different books and it would seem like I'd broken off but after 2 months I would be back at it.

There came a time when I wanted to give up on Christianity. The only thing that kept me going was the fact that I'd found purpose and at every point where I wanted to give up, purpose would just keep nagging at me. I'd hear God say, "I didn't bring you this far to leave you. I'm still working in you."

It wasn't until I discovered that you couldn’t resist addictions on your own that I broke free.
I discovered James 4:7 in the Bible. At different times, people had quoted this scripture to me emphasising, “Resist the devil and he'll flee from you." But nobody ever mentioned the first part of that verse which says "Submit yourself to God." Jude 24 also says that: "He is the only wise God who is able to keep you from falling." But I came to understand He is able to keep me from falling only when I submit to Him. So my strategy changed.

My longing for porn would come in seasons and at every point they came, I knew it was time for separation. The first thing I did was turn to the Holy Spirit and ask Him for help. One way or the other the urge would die and then I would fast. As I share this, I won't say I don't still get urges to look at porn, but because I have found a strategy that works for me, every time they come, I apply it.

I don't know why God didn't just stop the porn addiction as abruptly as He did the weed addiction, but what I do know is He's a mysterious God. His ways are not like ours and eventually when I meet Him, I'll ask why.

(Part 1/2) When I was 17, my cousin introduced me to smoking weed. It wasn't something I did regularly, just once in a while, however when I moved back to Lagos it became a normal thing for me. It became routine and I went beyond smoking it to having it as coffee in the morning; I would boil weed and mix it with milk and sugar and drink it. It was that intense.

I used to be perpetually high for about 12 to 16 hours. Even after drinking and eating it with my food, I’d still hang out with some boys behind the Arts block at the University of Lagos to smoke. I was always high.

It got to a point where I started having hallucinations, hearing and seeing things that were not really there. I became paranoid. People would be around me just chatting and laughing and I would think they were talking about me. I realised I couldn't go on like this. In my mind I knew I was running mad. People around me didn't know what was going on inside me. I knew I was helpless. One night I was really high, sleep didn't come and I cried my eyes out.

The funny thing about when I was taking drugs was that I'd smoke weed and be high but still listen to sermons in my high state. One night I wrote a one-page letter to God telling Him that I wanted out and I didn't want to struggle with smoking weed anymore. I told him, “I can't help myself, I surrender to you.”

I stopped and until today I still cannot explain how I quit the habit. My friends that I used to smoke with didn’t believe it and told me I’d be back smoking within one month. They had tried and relapsed time and time again. I can tell you honestly now that as I share this story with you, I have never had a craving for weed since I wrote that letter to God. I don’t know how it happened. I studied psychology so I understand relapse and the different seasons of withdrawal, but I cannot explain psychologically or scientifically how I stopped smoking weed. On several occasions, I would make myself walk past joints where I had smoked before just to be sure that the craving was really gone. Every time, I would feel nothing.

(Read the concluding part of this story on our website.)

Growing up, I never knew my father. I was actually an unwanted child, but my mum chose to have me despite it all. 

People would ask me where my dad was, so one question I lived with for so long was, “Where is your dad Faith?” I asked my mum several times and she always told me now is not the right time to hear the story. 

I graduated from school in October 2015, still wanting to know more about my father. Finally, the story was told in May 2016. I was really looking forward to meeting him but unfortunately, I couldn’t. 

My dad died on the 31st of August, 2016. It was really painful. I heard he was a Muslim. Though I didn’t get the chance to have a father-daughter relationship, I thank God for a wonderful mother.

(Read the first part of this story on our website.)

(Part 2/2) "Thank God you're buying the socks, when are you bringing them?", the teacher asked. I said next week. In my mind, I thought it was socks for just the few kids that were being punished, then he said: "Are you buying socks for all the kids in the school?" I said, "Yes, but, wait a minute, how many kids do you have here?" He told me there were 1000 kids and I was like: "What! Oh my God!" There I was, a broke hungry girl, wondering how I'm going to get money to buy socks for a thousand kids.  

But it happened that someone in my church saw that I wasn't smiling and asked if I was okay. I told them I promised some kids I was going to buy socks for them and I have no idea where I am going to get the money from. She said "Oh! are you serious, I'll give you the money, how much is it?" It was about 35,000 naira and she gave it to me. I couldn’t believe it. 

That's how I then bought socks for 1000 kids. You should have seen their faces, they were shouting, jumping, excited because they got just a pair of socks. And I'm wondering, really, "it's just a pair of socks." So I became inspired to do more and worked with a friend. We then bought exercise books the next month. Then the next term we brought water bottles and it went on from there. I was getting support from people too and then a lawyer friend advised me to register it as a NGO, so people would take me seriously. That's how ‘Beyond the Classroom’ was born. 

Our work primarily is with kids in public primary schools in Lagos. We provide school supplies annually. We also train their teachers every term. We run weekly after school clubs: our volunteers run the math club, readers and writers club, literary debating, and music clubs every Wednesday. We organise Christmas parties, graduation ceremonies for the children from primary 6 to Js1 (Junior Secondary School), and the most exceptional student gets a scholarship to a private secondary school. We also work with these schools to try and get some of the students enrolled, sometimes on scholarships. We commemorate a lot of days like World Health Day, World Literacy Day etc. just to help them understand what's happening in the world and learn beyond the four walls of their classroom, which is where we got the name. 

It's been five years now and the experience has been amazing.

(Part 1/2) My teenage years were very challenging. I'd lost both parents and I was putting myself through school, I also have three younger brothers who I had to take care of. 

One day while in my 2nd year, I was on my way to school, University of Lagos (UNILAG), I was really broke at that time, so I had to walk to school that morning from home, even though my house wasn't too far, because I was hungry and tired it felt far. I had a test that morning, but I was just upset. So while I was walking I was just talking to God and telling Him “You know what, this is not the kind of life I asked for, I didn’t ask to be born, you can't just bring me to earth and make me suffer.” And so I was just complaining and having conversations with God that day. 

I was listening to a song while I was walking and the song was actually a prayer, because right there, God opened my eyes to see a small boy on his way to school (Akoka Primary School) right beside UNILAG. He was wearing tattered socks, torn uniform and he was just not bothered. And then I don't know what happened, all I do know is that I followed the boy. Instead of going straight into UNILAG, I followed him into his school. 

In the school compound, I saw a bunch of kids being punished. I thought they were being punished for being late, so I went to go plead on their behalf and then I also noticed they all weren't wearing socks. The teacher was saying, "if I beat you then you'll tell your parents to buy socks for you." And it just hit me, it's not their fault they don't have socks, beating them won't change anything. And so I said to the teacher, "Is it possible to let them go?" He said, "Are you going to buy socks for them?" Without knowing what I was doing I said: "Yes" then he said "Okay, no problem, you can all go." The children were all so excited, they kept saying “Thank you aunty, God bless you,” and left for their classes.

(Read the concluding part of this story on our website.)

In 2006, after my O Levels I started believing God for admission to university. I wrote the university entrance exams (JAMB) twice. I passed but didn't get admitted into university. Someone asked me to pay about N150,000 to secure admission at my school of choice but I refused as that was a lot of money. My mom got tired and wanted to open a shop for me to start hairdressing and selling cosmetics which wasn't a bad idea but I really wanted to further my education first. So I told my mom not to worry, that I’d be strong and take care of myself. 

I started selling fruits, eggs and groundnuts by the roadside in Port Harcourt. Then I opened a business centre and was selling recharge cards and offering phone calls services. I had the determination that I was going to further my education. I was able to save up N5,000 for polytechnic JAMB and I got admitted to school in 2008 at Federal Polytechnic Nekede, Imo state. While in school, I continued my business and mom also supported me so I lived comfortably throughout school. 

Today, I'm a microbiologist, a serving Youth Corp member, passing out in a few weeks! I still intend to study more as I find it highly exciting and an avenue for positive self expression and fulfillment.

I applied for a Master’s degree for the second time in University of Ibadan and was accepted. I had just finished NYSC and was jobless so I started to tutor at an adult evening school to earn just enough money to meet basic daily needs. My dad is a retiree and mom, a secondary school teacher. I just believed that God would come through for me to enable me to pay my fees. 

The month I was supposed to resume in school for the Master’s program, a friend of mine came to my house to tell me that he needs my help to assist him in teaching corps members and other people on how to do the electronic voters registration. Earlier that day, he went to drop his mom at work (INEC) and found the staff battling with the computer. My friend knew what to do and helped them out so the zonal head insisted he be the one to tutor everyone on how to operate it. Being somewhat more computer savvy than my friend, I was called to help. That was how I saved about N30,000 to buy basic things and transport myself from Akwa Ibom state to Ibadan not knowing where I'd stay or how I'd pay my school fees. God kept opening doors of favour and help for me and met all my needs. Even after the MSc when I was applying for my present job, I was one of three candidates (two of whom had strong connections) but I got the job. 

All I had was God and that was enough.

(Read the first part of this story on our website.)

(Part 2/2) I gained admission into Lagos State University (LASU) part-time after years of trying to get into university. By the time I got to my 2nd year, my dad’s life took a bad turn and his finances dwindled. He refused to pay my school fees. He came back to Nigeria not knowing he wouldn’t be able to go back to London. He started selling all that he had. I sold used clothes, underwear (okirika) and recharge cards to make ends meet. I had options of looking for an Aristo when it was difficult to pay my school fees but I made up my mind not to. 

In February 2010, my father died after a brief illness. My younger sister was brought back from the UK. I was left with my siblings with no hope. People couldn’t understand how we survived because we had lost everything. By this time, I was born again, so I just handed over my life and my siblings to God. My siblings and I had to live with different people because we didn’t have a good house to live in. In my 3rd year of university, I started photography, got a place to intern and that was the beginning of my photography journey. I stopped masturbating, but I started having the urges over and over, again. I sought therapy and it was discovered that I never healed from all I bottled in. I’ve started therapy and I’m also willing to go for more therapy with my spouse before I get married. 

I run an enterprise of my own and I have empowered about 500 Nigerians with the skills God has blessed me with. I believe God is real because despite everything that happened to me, I'm still here.

(Part 1/2) I experienced my first abuse when I was 7 by my neighbour’s son. I had a series of abuse after the first one, but that was the only one my mum knew about. I was abused by her brother who would come to visit us during the holidays. At the time, I was 9. I knew what he was doing was wrong but I never told my mum. This went on repeatedly. I had already started masturbating when I was 7. When I was 13, I loved to read romance books, so when I needed inspiration to masturbate, I would pick up one of the romance novels and look for specific pages. I had so much information stored up in my head. 

At 13, we had financial issues in my family, so my dad suggested I go live with his sister, my aunt. She never really liked me but her husband did not mind, so he gave the consent for me to move in with them. I remember one day, my aunt's husband asked me, “Kike would you prefer I spank or scold you when you do something wrong, or would you prefer I kiss or hug you?” I replied, “Daddy, I’ll prefer you hug me.” I never knew he was indirectly asking for my permission to abuse me, so I gave consent. One day, after writing my first West African Examination Council (WAEC) exam, I got home, and was washing the dishes. He came to meet me in the kitchen and he started kissing me, touching my breasts and playing with my genitals. I remember him pulling down my pants, and he saw the fear in my eyes. He told me not to worry that he wouldn’t penetrate or disvirgin me. When he was done, I cried, thinking, "Is this what I was created for?" I was a bit surprised this was coming from him, because everyone adored him and he was very kind. My heart broke. I was in that house for 4 months and I can’t remember how many times this happened, because it continued. I eventually left and moved back home after my exams. 

Few months after secondary school, my mother walked out of our lives forever and we don’t know where she is till today.

(Read the concluding part of this story on our website.)

Growing up was not too bad. I was in sports. It was during this period that I met the father of my child. He was a coach who lived abroad. We started dating and also eventually did our introduction. Few months to our wedding, a friend of mine came to Nigeria from abroad who was also a coach. We got talking and I showed him the picture of my husband to be, and he told me he knows the guy, that he's married with 2 kids out of the country. I was broken, because he never told me. When my uncle later confronted him, he said it was his mother that forced him to marry the lady and now he wanted to marry his own. I said goodbye to him. 2 months later, we had to contact him when we found out I was pregnant. I personally hired detectives to get in touch with his wife and explain to her that I didn’t know her husband was married but he had a child outside. We called off the wedding. He was mad that I contacted his wife. He came around when I gave birth to my daughter, then the next time we saw him was when she was 2 years old. We didn’t hear from him again till she was 15 years old. 

I was solely responsible for bringing up and taking care of our child. I was living on the Island at the time and had a lot of wealthy friends around me, but I took myself away from the limelight and went to a remote place. I rented an apartment. My family and everyone else were against it. I told my parents I wanted to start my life from scratch. So I left with my baby at just 6 months old. Life was okay. I stopped sports and started working for someone who was a vendor in a top oil and gas company for 4 years. My daughter has been a blessing; I don't know what I’d have done if she wasn't in my life. It wasn’t easy forgiving her father. Over the years, God kept telling me everything can't be right with me when I’m holding someone in unforgiveness, so I had to forgive him. Today my daughter is in her twenties and she's in university.

I do not have any memory of my father carrying me as a child. There are very few pictures of us together in any photo. We have very little in common because I fought to keep it that way. You see, my father did the best he could to have a comfortable life. I and my siblings were born into that comfort but slowly, from one economic crisis to another and with every bad decision in between, we watched the silver spoon corrode in our mouths and so I was angry. I was angry that he stood still and watched his children's dreams go away. 

He compromised so often that I began to question his role as a father figure. We waged wars in our living room and did not care about collateral damage. My mother was often in the middle of it all. I was bent on becoming the exact opposite of him, so I started with the little things; sports selection, vocation, hobbies, and habits. I was being moulded into the niche anger created for me until I spoke about the anger that had formed a man so different from the 5-year old me and in that moment, I cried; not because I was hurt, but because what I ran from was what I desired. 

A miracle is not a dramatic event that causes change. It is the change itself. It might have been the tears that I shed or the fact I spoke out loud, but from that point, I made a decision to love my father without expectations, see him as human and trust God to bring out the best in both of us. My father and I are trying to have a functional relationship because we both know it's not too late.

I felt a calling to start an organisation to help children in Ikorodu go to school; kids like me that struggled because of their impoverished backgrounds. As I shared my story with people around me, God opened doors and resources were provided. We registered a 501c3; a tax exempt non-profit organisation and we set out to sponsor forty kids in our first year (2015/2016). We held a few fundraisers and ended up raising over $20,000. This was enough to sponsor forty children attending six different schools in Ikorodu. This is my first trip back home since the fundraiser and it's amazing to see the kids we supported last year. We have a dream to support even more kids and eventually build a clinic. My life and experiences set me on this path to help others, and hopefully it is just beginning. I'm still in medical school and currently in my 4th year.